Soeur Kimmy Tribe's Continual Missionary Life: Nov. 30 Letter: Sorrowful, yet always rejoicing (2 Corinthians 6:10)

Bonjour les Soeur!

Some of you may have heard, my family has had a rough week to say the least.

My older brother Chase was in a terrible car accident on Wednesday. We don’t know all the details of what happened but we know that for some reason he was driving on the highway and all the saddened nose dived across a few lanes and hit a semi that was parked on the side of the highway. He took most of the impact to his forehead. By a miracle, there was an EMT just driving by who stopped and was able to help. As well as there was a police officer nearby. The Lord was with him and merciful to him. He was rushed to a hospital where he underwent a six hour brain surgery and a two hour eye surgery.

Wednesday we had been having a great morning. My parents and I had gone out to breakfast and afterwards my mom was making her famous sweet rolls. We got the call from the hospital around midday. All they told us was that Chase had been in a terrible accident and that they should come of the hospital. My parents went straight down and I finished with the projects we had going around the house. They called me and told me that he was in surgery and that I should probably come down.

I waited with my parents and my brother and sister-in-law in the operation waiting room. An hour of so latter the surgeon came in and gave us the report and we all went up to the ICU. My parents went back and shortly thereafter my mom came and got my brother to come and give him a blessing with my dad. After that we were allowed to go back and see him. His girlfriend was a mess. I mostly just tried to comfort her. Chase was in a coma and there was really nothing we could do for him except pray.

And that became our new normal. Every day my parents wake up, do their morning routine and then they head down to the hospital. They are here usually until 8:00 or 9:00 pm then they head home and sleep. The next day they wake up and do it again. I come down about everyday to say hello. To be honest, I’m so nervous every time I’m here. He looks really bad. And to be honest, I’m nervous what will happen when he fully wake up. I just don’t know how to help.

He’s doing really well. He started responding to commands – wiggle your toes, give us a thumb up – Thursday. The doctors are cautiously optimistic that he is progressing so quickly. He can move both sides of his body. We’re pretty sure he will be completely bind in one eye and the doctor said they other eye wasn't responding well to light so he may be mostly bind in that eye too. It’s too soon to tell. It’s too soon to tell anything really. We don’t know what kind of damage he sustained to him brain or anything yet. We’ll find out over the next few weeks I guess.

He’s really agitated. He moved around a lot and has even tried to sit up a few times. It’s too early for all of that so they had to restrain him. When my dad is here though, he can talk to him and get him to lie down and Chase will listen. So he doesn't have to be restrained when my dad is watching him.

It’s really too soon to know anything. Honestly, everything could head downhill in a minute but we’re hopefully and prayerful. We feel like it’s his choice whether or not he wants to stay and it seems so far he’s choosing to stay.

In other news, Chase the boy who kissed me is back. Haha that seems dumb to bring up next to all that has happened but I’m glad he’s back. He got in Saturday night and I went and picked him up from the airport. We spent the night mostly just chatting. I think I may have rushed things a little too quick with him in my need for comfort so I think I’m to talk to him tonight when I see him. Sometimes I get a little carried away. :) But I do like him and I think I will keep dating him. He’s a cute guy.

I get so nervous when I’m in the hospital. I don’t like sitting here. It makes me nervous but I want to be here for him and my parents. My dad told Chase I was here and he gave the thumbs up. So I went over and held him hand and he gave me a squeeze. Oh man. I really get nervous. It’s a good thing I figured out the medical world was not for me. I don’t think I could do what these nurses and doctors do all day.

And I double don’t like watching them put ointment in his eyes or change his gaze or anything like that. It freaks me out a little when he moves. Haha I’m so dumb.

Well miracle! Tonight he was talking. Mostly nonsense – he was rapping something for my mom – but he was responding to questions and commands. It’s awesome! The unfortunate part was he could then communicate how much pain he’s in. They've upped his pain medications.

We fasted for Chase, my brother, today as a family. We then had a family dinner at my brother Josh's house. My parents went back up to the hospital pretty soon there after and I opted to hang out with Josh and we decided to go up to the hospital later. I love my brother Josh. I just think he is so wise. We had a really good talk about life. Jobs, families, dating, the balance between having fun opportunities and making time for dating and "husband hunting". It was all really good. It gave me lots of think about.

I drove home a little early tonight with my dad. He has to go back to work tomorrow. I get a lot of anxiety when I'm in the hospital room with Chase. When I found out he had woken up and was talking, I'm a bit ashamed to say I was grateful I wasn't there when it happened. He doesn't look like Chase. I don't think he should talk in my mind because he's just so banged up. I hit my limit and had to get out quick. It was just too much for me and I was nervous he'd wake back up. So my dad and I headed back out.

It was just a great day for talking! My dad and I discussed about the gospel and revelation and agency. The older I get the more I realize how much God allows us to choose in our lives. We can choose EVERYTHING. He has no set plans for us. He just gives us the commandments - to keep us safe - and then allows us to figure out how to live the higher law and make something amazing out of our lives. How in the world are we suppose to choose?! That's the questions running through my head tonight. I asked my dad if he would give me a blessing when we got home and he did. Priesthood blessings are the greatest. I am so grateful that my dad is a worthy priesthood holder and can give me that kind of guidance and blessing in my life whenever I need or would like it.

The blessing really helped answer some of my questions. I need to be more diligent in my studies. I need to strum up the drive to get really job searching. And I need to set my priorities when it comes to dating. My brother told me I need to get good at defining my vision of my life so that I can communicate that with clarity while dating. Find someone who is excited by the same idea as me and who is willing to sacrifice for me and I'm willing to sacrifice for them.

There is just so much to think about when it comes to being a grown up.

I spoke in one of the home wards in my stake today with one of the high councilmen today. I think I'm headed for the post mission speaking tour soon. I totally forgot I was speaking till Saturday night. I woke up this morning completely unprepared. I knew I wanted to speak about baptism and that was about it. Revelation comes in different ways. My mom walked into my room this morning and I told her what I was speaking on and she talked about how our family has been so blessed by those who were willing to keep their baptismal covenants. It's so true!

We have truly seen many blessings from those who were willing to "mourn with those that mourn and comfort those who stand in need of comfort." (Mosiah 18:8-10) So I talked about that. I talked about what our baptismal covenant is and what a blessing it is for others when we are covenant keepers. It turned out pretty good if I do say so myself. Haha No thanks to me but to the Spirit working through me, an unprepared return missionary. What a miracle it is. I'm so grateful for the gospel and for all that I have come to learn and understand about it because of my mission and study.

Long email. Sorry Sisters. I love you all so much. I'm so grateful for your examples. Christ lives. Miracles happen. Prayers of faith are powerful things. Be mighty miracle workers this week. (Alma 26:12)

Bisous!

Sister Tribe